Nominee for Doofus-of-the-decade

If I were David Warren, the seer in seer-suckers and three-times-per-week columnist for the Ottawa Citizen, I would be a bit ashamed of my ignorance.

His recent piece on Forgettable Men was a shot at everyone except himself. Some of the shots were deserved; others, like his comment that "...Liberals in power have been bad news for Canada, since 1963," were sadly over the top.

Warren uses his column to find an excuse for the bone-head Maxie Bernier by slanting the story onto the backs of Liberals. Who cares why Bernier was dumped, asks Warren. "I care," he answers his own question. Why does he care? Is it because state confidential documents were let loose? NO. Was it because Harper had knowledge of the situation all the while he abused the opposition who asked about it? NO. It was because the scandal... err, misunderstanding, could result in the failure of Harper to win a majority government and maybe let the big bad Liberals back in power. OOOOhhh. How scary is that, Davie?

While I would be the last person to say that the Liberals have been squeaky clean, to say that the have been bad news for Canada since 1963, as does Davie, is a bit of a nose-stretcher. The Liberals have been good for this country... better, I dare say, than the GST-loving, NAFTA-failing, don't care about anything but winning, Conservatives have been.

Lying' Brian, Joe Who, Flash Campbell and Harpo. These must be Warrens heroes.

There is a train out of town at 6 AM, Davie. We would all appreciate if you were on it

Ice Cream for me

I decided to take the National Ice Cream Company to court to force them to make dog food flavoured ice cream. Being a Canadian senior on a fixed income, I have grown fond of dog food.

I have the Ice Cream lobby supporting me in this suit because, I suppose, it will make the lobbyists more money. I also have the CARP folks in my corner because, while dog food ice cream is not a popular flavour, they want more choices for their members.

Everything was going swimmingly until yesterday when I made a bit of a mistake. I demanded in my suit that, if the company did not produce dog food ice cream, they would have to cease production of all ice cream. That was when the wheels fell off my campaign. The lobbyists would lose their clients and CARP members would lose 50% of their calories. All of a sudden I was alone in my suit and shunned by my fellow CARP members.

Does this sound like a strange scenario? Compare it to what is happening with the Women's Ski Jumping lobby and the 2010 Olympic games.

Dr. Perfect PP

So here I am in Vancouver, the home of the crazies and who should I hear a story about but the Perfect PP, Pierre Poilievre, the mighty mouse Con MP for Nepean Carleton. What could PP have said that could possibly get the tongues wagging on the Left Coast? Seems that PP has decided that, in addition to his training as a Con mouth piece and bum boy for many of the lesser-known Con politicos, he is now a qualified mental health doctor.

"I think that if people want this medically unnecessary treatment, they have that right. But taxpayers should not have to pick up the tab for it," spouts Perfect PP. What ever could he be talking about?

PP has his shorts in a knot over the 8 or 10 sex change operations performed in Ontario every year. It doesn't matter to PP that these procedures are deemed necessary by medical and mental health professionals who subject applicants for the procedure to strict evaluation. It also doesn't matter to PP that the total bill for the procedures is in the range of $170,000 per year out of a health care budget of billions of dollars.

PP wants the federal government to withhold medical funding transfers to Ontario until they come up to his standard.

Funny thing is that PP is actually an Alberta transplant to Nepean Carleton but he does not seem to apply his same logic to Alberta which also funds the procedures. It is also a funny thing that he does not attack the Canadian military which agreed to fund this type of procedure a couple of years back.

Can you spell "election pandering"?

Health Board for Ottawa?

A word of warning to city council and all Ottawa taxpayers. The idea of an 13 member independent health board (including 6 councillors) to make "non-politicized" decisions may sound like a great idea... and it is... BUT...

Do not let the board get away from you like the Police Services Board did. You may remember the latest fiasco called the city budget wherein the Police Board demanded a whopper of an increase in their suck on the taxpayer teat and council had no recourse other than to say "how high".

I wonder if the same could happen with this health board? I wonder if the board decided that there should be free Wii systems for all kids to counter the spread (no pun intended) of obesity and put a one year price on it of $10 million, would council have the right or the gumption to overturn an "independent" board?

Careful for what you ask... you might get it... in the ear!

Ottawa Sun brightens my day

I picked up the Ottawa Sun at my local Loeb yesterday. I read through the stories which were interesting but not really news. I made it to all the way to page 10 without the little hairs on the back of my neck standing up. Then it began.

"And a chicken in every pot", rings the headline on an article by Paul Berton. The article was about political promises. Paul started off by referring to Barrack Obama's election platform as vague; he says that Obama hasn't made many promises. Your right, Paul, he has not made many promises but, guess what, he is not running in the presidential election today, He is running to be the Democratic nominee for the November election. Why on God's green earth would you expect a nominee-in-the-making to be making promises as if it were an election.

Page 11 really got me going. Chrissy Blizzard laments that the auto industry is headed for the ditch. While the industry is being hammered by unions and the high dollar, Chrissy blames it on Dalton McGuinty. He is giving too much money to the big auto guys and getting nothing but lay-offs in return. She quotes the two paragons of wisdom from Queens Park. NDP leader and hotellier Howie Hampton Inn was "in high dungeon yesterday" (what ever does that mean?) as he hammered the government for handing over money to the auto sector and not getting job guarantees in return. Then she quotes the ever-lovable non-MPP John Tory, leader-in-limbo of the Ontario Cons, who wants deals with automakers to be made public. Yea, as if that will ever happen even if the Cons were [shutter] in power!)

So let me straighten out this dog's breakfast for you. Number one, investments made by the government in the auto sector are not limited the "Big Three". Second, investments are not made to stop layoffs in any short term horizon. Three, it can take 2-5 years to bring a new car or class of cars to market from the time of inception. Four, investment being made are to ensure the future of the auto sector in Ontario (I bet you even Federal Minster of Money and Mouth-piece for the I-hate-Ontario crowd, Jim Flaherty would agree with that.) Case in point, the Ontario government invested $58 million in GMs Centre of Excellence at the University of Ontario Institute of Technology. GM forked over most the rest of the $120 million to get the centre operational. Ontario Development and Trade Minister Sandra Pupatello was at GM for the announcement of the investment. So what does Chrissy say about the occasion? "... Pupatella gush[ed] about a new Camero [on display]..." It may be time to retire, Chrissy.

As if I hadn't had enough of the Sun, my eyes beheld the photo of Wally Robinson, failed Taxpayer Association head, failed Mayoralty Chief of Staff, failed Federal PC candidate, but a great dad, according to him. Wally argues that the federal government should not be judged by the scandals, err... misunderstandings, that brew around them, They should not be judged by the girlfriends they keep or the gaffes they make or the way they treat the people's money and the press. After all, they are the "Harper Government" and that makes them closer to God than the rest of us. They may tell little fibs from time to time, but hey, they lowered the GST rate (big deal). They may use law suits to silence their critics but, don't fret, they made some tax changes for families. And on and on, ad nauseum, blurts Wally for two whole columns. I could just lose my lunch.

I like the Sun, although I like it more when you didn't have to hunt for the page with the Sunshine Girl.